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Help a clueless Bule?

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12:12 am
March 27, 2009

TidakMasalah

Santri

posts 23

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Pakmantri,

interesting perspective. Thank you.

Of course, I agree that people are people, and that certainly includes prostitutes. And honestly, I'm not passing judgement on prostitutes. Sometimes people do things they don't want to do because they feel they don't have a choice. I completely understand this.

I'm only speaking for myself when I say I don't want to purchase sex from prostitutes. Some people's opinions that sex is always bought and paid for one way or another notwithstanding, I personally prefer for sex to be preceded by such trifling things as mutual attraction and affection at the very least, and ideally an actual relationship too.

I find your hypothetical scenario interesting, but highly unlikely. Frankly, I'm not that great. I'm no Richard Gere and she was no Julia Roberts, and our encounter was no 'Pretty Woman'.

But I do appreciate your romantic optimism and I can tell that you are probably a very kind and forgiving person, and I for one hope that you are right about the world and I am not.

7:26 am
April 3, 2009

finallywoken

New Member

posts 1

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Heard (or read) my name was mentioned and here comes Finally Woken to the rescue :D

Hope it isn't too late, but there's another kind of girls no one has ever mentioned here in this thread: a professional girlfriend.

What they do is basically trying to get men to be their boyfriend-cum-providers. Some of them are prostitutes, some are not. The difference is they wouldn't take money, and instead, ask you to pay for others: clothes, food, gadgets, tuition, sick family, you name it. They might or might not have a descent job in a daylight. What they want is a boyfriend/husband (or should I say a constant provider?).

There are several alarming signs about the girl you met:

1) most girls in Indonesia go in a group. No sane & descent girl would stay alone at the hotel lobby after working hours unless she's waiting for someone (or something).

2) The fact that she cried to a stranger was also a bizarre thing. Normal people don't do that. Even girls. Especially just after conducting a business.

3) She suggestively showed her mobile and let you buy a new one for her. And clothes. And I don't know what else. Again, just put yourself in a normal dating world in your country. Would you buy something expensive for a girl you just met, not just one, but many items? No? Well, there you go. Descent people don't expect anything when they're dating. If someone asks you to pay for her taxi ride just because she has spent the night at your place, it's another bad signal. You wouldn't do that to a girl in your country right? Well no nice girl in Indonesia expects you to do so.

4) Her text message was a bit OTT. Remember when you would actually start calling someone 'honey'. And see whether you feel it's too soon.

One night stands happen a lot in Jakarta, lots of girls I know actually actively looking for one just for fun. But Jakarta is a very small city these girls have reputations to preserve so they either take a fresh meat, like you (sorry), or go to Bali or Singapore. So you can't just judge whether she is a prostitute or not by ONS.

Guess one thing you should do is open up your eyes and keep yourself alert, like whether she starts telling you story about a sick aunty, or a nephew who's starting the school but have no money and she is the provider in the family and asks if you could help her. Or ask you to pay for her mobile bill (a guy I know had to pay 8mio after he agreed to do so, the girl used her mobile to phone her real boyfriend in China). See if she introduces you to her friends and see whether they're descent. Check her background, if necessary suddenly phone her and say you're at her school/hospital to pick her up and see her reaction.

Guess I should say good luck!

5:25 pm
April 3, 2009

Mbak Sri

Abangan

posts 5

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Dont know what the fuss about, really. If it didnt feel right, stop it. Trust yer guts, its there for a reason, ya know. Women are more or less the same anywhere.

To Mas Finally Woken:

You said:

1) most girls in Indonesia go in a group. No sane & descent girl would stay alone at the hotel lobby after working hours unless she's waiting for someone (or something).

Tho mostly true, it isnt entirely correct either. Depending on the hotel and where the loby is located. I wouldnt make an assumption.

You also said:

So you can't just judge whether she is a prostitute or not by ONS

which I agree completely.

To TM,

Just go easy on the judgement, it is never an attractive quality in a person anyway :) (I know.. i know.. you yourself didnt judge, but some of the poster here did, so…. hehe)

cheers!

9:07 am
April 4, 2009

Farah

Sumatra Jungle

Santri

posts 51

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finallywoken said:

Heard (or read) my name was mentioned and here comes Finally Woken to the rescue

Hope it isn't too late, but there's another kind of girls no one has ever mentioned here in this thread: a professional girlfriend.

What they do is basically trying to get men to be their boyfriend-cum-providers. Some of them are prostitutes, some are not. The difference is they wouldn't take money, and instead, ask you to pay for others: clothes, food, gadgets, tuition, sick family, you name it. They might or might not have a descent job in a daylight. What they want is a boyfriend/husband (or should I say a constant provider?).

There are several alarming signs about the girl you met:

1) most girls in Indonesia go in a group. No sane & descent girl would stay alone at the hotel lobby after working hours unless she's waiting for someone (or something).

2) The fact that she cried to a stranger was also a bizarre thing. Normal people don't do that. Even girls. Especially just after conducting a business.

3) She suggestively showed her mobile and let you buy a new one for her. And clothes. And I don't know what else. Again, just put yourself in a normal dating world in your country. Would you buy something expensive for a girl you just met, not just one, but many items? No? Well, there you go. Descent people don't expect anything when they're dating. If someone asks you to pay for her taxi ride just because she has spent the night at your place, it's another bad signal. You wouldn't do that to a girl in your country right? Well no nice girl in Indonesia expects you to do so.

4) Her text message was a bit OTT. Remember when you would actually start calling someone 'honey'. And see whether you feel it's too soon.

One night stands happen a lot in Jakarta, lots of girls I know actually actively looking for one just for fun. But Jakarta is a very small city these girls have reputations to preserve so they either take a fresh meat, like you (sorry), or go to Bali or Singapore. So you can't just judge whether she is a prostitute or not by ONS.

Guess one thing you should do is open up your eyes and keep yourself alert, like whether she starts telling you story about a sick aunty, or a nephew who's starting the school but have no money and she is the provider in the family and asks if you could help her. Or ask you to pay for her mobile bill (a guy I know had to pay 8mio after he agreed to do so, the girl used her mobile to phone her real boyfriend in China). See if she introduces you to her friends and see whether they're descent. Check her background, if necessary suddenly phone her and say you're at her school/hospital to pick her up and see her reaction.

Guess I should say good luck!

Clap Clap …. agree in most of your opinion.. especially in # 1. If she looks like she feel bit cozy and comfort to sit alone in a hotel lobby..it MIGHT be a sign that its a normal/daily/usual things for her to visit the hotel lobby.

9:18 am
April 4, 2009

Farah

Sumatra Jungle

Santri

posts 51

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Aluang Anak Bayang said:

TidakMasalah,

Only read your today.

Yup, no doubt she is a prostie.

1) Decent Javanese women would not readily jump into bed (and especially with a whitey).

2) Decent Javanese women would not want to be seen going out with a man, if she is not confident that it would led to marriage.

3) Usually parents are involved if you try to ditch a decent Javanese girl.

However, not all Asian women are reserved. I can only speak this much for Indians, Indonesians, Vietnamese and some Chinese girls.

Japanese and Korean girl students are notorious for no-hold bar one-night stand.

You should be enjoying your best sexual encounter with her, but hang on tight to your wallet. Not many guys can experience having seen a hottie, and manage to shag her. It is completely different if you have to go to a brothel to pick out a chick. Your experience was the envy of most warm-blooded guy.

I think whether she is javanese or kalimantan, or sumatra, if she claimed (ever) to be "indonesian woman" we have our own norm, culture, etc which made us different than western woman. So free/easy/one night stand its not on "indonesian woman" usual things to do in a normal relationship.

Grin at # 3 hehe….

7:02 am
June 13, 2009

Mas Fred

Abangan

posts 9

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Sorry to be blunt (and from a new forum member as well) but stand back.

I didn't read all the thread but I did read the story of your meeting.

Bit of a generalisation but most of the girls who hang around japanese businessmen are in business themselves. Been there and seen it.

I've had all the stories about being poor and having a sick mother/father/dog/pet chimp.

I'm sure they share a script.

Most Indonesian ladies I've met are really nice people. Many are very pretty. A few are on the game or just out for the cash.

Many of those are to be found in karaoke bars or hanging around rich businessmen.

9:27 pm
December 12, 2009

riniss

Abangan

posts 10

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to mr.Bule.

I read ur story.

in my opinion, that lady isnt a really good lady.

sorry for telling u that.

i didnt say she is a prostitute (or maybe she is???), could be she was trying to scam u or being a gold digger.

u know, most of indonesian girls think ALL bule are rich!

*except me.lol*

I bet she made up stories about being poor, or bla bla, purposed to have ur attentions.and u would be merci on her then u would flow ur cash on her.

very easy to know if this indonesian girl is a good girl or not:

1.good girl wont to come to hotel room with stranger.

2.wont have sex with stranger either. n u told her u wont to have sex with her (means to respect her).but she kept seducing u, rite?like, umm, sat on ur lap while u were working.

3.she didnt show u where she lived, nor introduced u to her family (parents, siblings, or other relatives she has).u know, a good girl would be happy to introduce her close friend/bf/lover to her family.

4.really a good girl wont ask stranger to buy things to her self!or even take cash!

so u can imagine what kind of girl u met when u were in indonesia.

most of indonesian ladies are nice. but be careful!

if u really wanted to have nice, pretty, and good girl, just keep away from those kind of girl's attitudes i've mentioned.

u said she still emailing u.

of course she is!she wont loose her "bank" (u know what i mean rite?).

i had bule bf, but never asking him for cash or fancy stuffs, except he bought me as gift for my birthday.

and never seducing him to have sex with me, or going to hotel room.because we knew we loved to each other.beside, im a eastern girl who expect to get married first then have sex. so what do u say a girl who wanted to have sex with stranger???

well,she made u in love with her.so whatever she did and said, that was good for u. but i dont think she was really into u.

everything about cash, i think.

btw, im sorry for telling u that.

peace! Wink

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