Bulwom: Bule Women

Feb 4th, 2010, in News, Opinion, by

The types of Bulwom in Indonesia, bule women, and how they fare in attracting local men.


Why Do Bule Sistas in Yogya Get More Action Than Sistas in Jakarta?

The Friend,

I ever hear the Bule woman in Jakarta complaining about a date. Cannot get, cannot get she says. As a student of Achmad Sudarsono's techniques of Seksiness, I let the Bule Woman's (Bulwom) lamentations just pass by, like one of those silly human rights reports criticising our national heroes.

Guruh SoekarnoputraBut Friend, just like the question of what colour exactly is Guruh Soekarnoputra's hair, there is a mystery and conundrums.

Why does the student Bulwom in Yogya and Bali get more traffic than Jl. Thamrin at sunset when the Bulwom in Jakarta goes without lovin', or as we Betawis say, 'jablai' (jarang dibelai or rarely touched)?

Bulwom YogyaThe Bulwom comes from countries like Australia, America or Belanda, to schools and university in Yogyakarta to study the gamelan or write thesis about things no one is interested in like, 'Jamu and Gender: Post-Modern Discourse of the Indonesian Mushroom Drink.' (Lazy but Seksi Friends, can find a post-modern essay generator here. http://www.elsewhere.org/pomo/). Then the Bulwom teaches generation of other students to write things no one is interested in.

But, Astaga and Aduhai ! Bulwom gets more action - if it is possible - than Achmad Sudarsono after an unplugged Ukulele session at Jl. Blora.

Samantha FoxAmidst the long-haired self stroking bohemians of the Art School, Bulwom is bigger than Samantha Fox (so to speak). Bulwom chills into the rythym of Yogya, riding on the back of the motorbike, basking in the adoration and envy of the other long-haired would-be painters and art-stars.

Bulwom YogyaShe casts scornful glances at other suitors, knowing her desirability. Inevitably, though, most Bulwom abandon their local beau, when the question of marriage comes up. He turns into a brooding, psychotic stalker, not having been exposed to the Seksiness lessons of Pendekar/Guru Achmad. (Pak Achmad is said to be preparing a series of e-lessons, on how to be Seksi (tm)).

Kuta CowboyThe Bali Bulwom is a bit of a different story. Whilst I salute the resourcefulness of the Kuta Cowboys, going from amateur to pro is a big step, perhaps one for Guru Achmad to cover in the future.

Why then does the Jakarta Bulwom not swim in the local pond, like a mutated Ikan mas (gold fish) in the Ciliwung river ? As a humble Betawi bongo player, I am bemused. Bulwom Jakarte is often stressed and cranky, the seductive secrets of our kampungs eluding her as she sits in an air-conditioned fortress. betawi Does she know of the Ondel-Ondel ? Yet she is always complain, complain, complain.

But Bulwom, there are tens of thousands of able-bodied descendants of Si Pitong and other Betawi heroes ready to tend to your needs. Why don't you follow your Yogya sisters who take the lesehan (sit down outdoor cafe) and sup on local fare ?


80 Comments on “Bulwom: Bule Women”

  1. avatar Oigal says:

    Dikki/Assmad

    Seriously it just a poor rehash of the “Great Waddling Buffalo” (I think Timdog called it that) thread called Dating Indonesian Girls. High Volume, fast food with no substance, call it a MacCrap post if you will. Lots may use it but none would call it orginal or of any lasting value.

    Still, to be fair short of naming the post “Free Sex Here”, the “Bule vs Rest” post is a time honoured, if infantile way to generate some traffic when things are slow. In fact, you can almost predict on some sites when the next post on the topic will come. Not that I get particularly Unwound by that.

    People are curious creatures they will sometimes respond to the “one trick pony” even if it is a one trick pony by another name.

  2. Mr,. Oigal,

    I am ever glad we can be The Friend. Indeed, I learned much of my craft from Guru Achmad, but I am but a shadow of his seksiness, just as you are a shadow of mine. 😛 I look forward to future discussions of the Bule and his travails in Indonesia.

  3. avatar kalam teh says:

    Sujengkol, no that isnt what I am saying at all. Pretty obvious really, but it seems you find it difficult not to resort to employing crude stereotypes (professionally known as ‘hack journalism’). But anyway let me spell it out for you again: reductionist stereotypes say nothing about the individual being labelled (except perhaps their skin color, though i’d say mine is closer to pink than white :P) but do give insight into the one doing the labelling. Check your SD history books, ‘bule’ didnt colonise Indonesia, the Dutch, British and Japanese empires did. Sorry wasnt born then, so nothing to do with me. What you are using is generally referred to as ‘racism’, whether its ‘bule’, ‘orang hitam’, ‘papua’ or whatever. It is though, I’ll admit, a tempting path for those too intellectually lazy to think in a nuanced way…perhaps a career in politics beckons?

  4. Mr. Kalam,

    I ever think Dutch and English is Bule. And I see you think you can come to Indonesia and lecture the Indonesian Man about what is Rasis and what is not, when your Aborigin is still not merdeka. What about the aborigin ? Does he have human rights like the Bule ? And also, Friend, who is mostly go to Jl. Jaksa and Blok M ? Sure some nigerian, but mostly The Bule.

  5. avatar kalam teh says:

    Actually my family, and many others, have supported aboriginal rights groups since the 1960s, but of course how would you know that? Or how would you know we have those of aboriginal, malay and chinese and descent in our family? Of course you assumed otherwise based on your narrow idea of ‘bule’, ‘who go to Jaksa’. Thats the point. Sorry for not fitting your stereotype Pak. Btw the only person I am speaking to is you, I am not ‘lecturing indonesian man’, many of whom i would suspect wouldnt agree with your opinions either. Again you try to play a racist/nationalist card to disparage a different view. Unless perhaps, you consider yourself a representative of all men in this country? … itu namanya meglomania Pak, presiden pun gak nyampai gitu! hahaha

  6. Yes, yes, you can say this or that, and who said anything about the Chinese or Melayu in Australi ? I don’t know about your family, but i do know the fate of the aborigin. And yes, in Indonesia, we have a Pancasila Consensus – we reach mutual agreement, not like Bule country where he argue, argue, argue. Why do you think he is tired of his woman ?

  7. avatar kalam teh says:

    Wah but I am bule Pak, i thought you know all about us Pak! hahaha. I totally agree with you the the situation for aborginal Australians is terrible, but the connection to what i’ve been saying isnt so clear. I’m not trying to argue for any kind of racial or cultural superiority, malah against it. We are all human all too human, and all complex and diverse. The wisdom of Bhinekka tunggal ika applies to all humanity…

    As for your theory on parliamentary debate leading to men getting tired of their women? Interesting theory, i look forward to your article on it. How about opposition based parliamentary systems such as in India, Pakistan and a host of other non-‘bule’ country? Does that apply to women politicians as well? And seems from the papers here that there isnt as much consenus in Indonesian parliament as you suggest, selesaikan kasus Bank Century pun belum bisa. I think you’ll find that politics everywhere is pretty similar.Terima kasih Pak Sujengkol, I am enjoying this 😛

  8. Mr. Kalam Teh,

    Firstly, as a Bule, it will be hard for you to understand the internal subtleties of the Pancasila. I think the Aborigin is down because of the White Man, even if the Midnight Oil is ‘Sorry’. As for parliament, once again, with India and Pakistan – how can a Bule understand the mysteries of these great civilizations ? Congress is talk, talk, talk, and don’t want to pass bills in the U.S. because they are led by a Black Man. But for you now, just better to pay attention to your nearby RT/RW, seniors at the Pos Jaga, and Kepala Desa. They can instruct you in Pancasila education.

  9. avatar justme says:

    someone is digging themselves a hole me thinks….

    capek dech..

  10. Heh,

    Just me, I ever write a piece on Bules and Pembantus.

  11. avatar Grinchtour says:

    That ‘Bulworm’ is a pretty funny story. What I find amazing is that no matter where I go in this country, I find loads of switched on, funny, attractive Indonesian and foreign women (28-35) begging for a stable, decent fellow regardless of passport color, agama, status or whatever, to hang out with (and where the heck were y’all when I was single, many many moons ago!)
    I don’t wanna feed a thread that suggests “all bule” men like the taste of chicken, but while we’re playing that game, these gals all say the same thing: “all Indonesian” men turn into complete jackasses a month after they start pacaran. It’s like the smallest taste o trim trips a switch in their brains that turns sociable, curious hot young bucks into needy, jealous little Mamas boys.
    Wazzup with that?

  12. Halo Mr. The Grinchtours,

    1. No harm with sharing yourself around. Astaga and Aduhai !! The Prophet Mohamamd ever invent an institution to deal with it — poligami.

    2. On the stalker/jackass syndrome, maybe ever better to ask the Bulwom, friends.

  13. avatar justme says:

    hmmm usually they are asking for money. So we can buy them a new motorbike.

  14. avatar venna says:

    while we’re playing that game, these gals all say the same thing: “all Indonesian” men turn into complete jackasses a month after they start pacaran.
    __________________

    Seems the Bulwoms also like munching fried chicken 😉 But why only Indonesian women that labeled as “Ayam”? This type of Indonesian men is basically whoring around too. We need a new term for them.

  15. avatar justme says:

    Well … in bali Kuta Cowboy … in Jakarta perhaps Gigolo …

    kalo dlm bhs indo … kyknya blum dpt yg cocok dech

  16. avatar Nay says:

    It’s like the smallest taste o trim trips a switch in their brains that turns sociable, curious hot young bucks into needy, jealous little Mamas boys.
    Wazzup with that?

    It’s because they’ve *finally* succeeded in getting their own woman!
    It’s not easy for them! So they try to cling on for dear life.

    The women here mistakenly assume his jealousy is love, whereas in fact, he is a desperate man who is not very attractive to most ladies. And that’s where the problems start.

  17. avatar sara says:

    As an american bule woman living in jakarta, i’d have to say we don’t have it so bad (although i haven’t tried jogja or bali yet). I’m having a blast here! i like the local boys, and sometimes they like me too! haha. i’ve been kind of dating one for a while.
    my only complaint is that sometimes indo boys aren’t aggressive enough. I know they’re interested but they seem nervous to make the move. I’m glad to make the first move if I’m interested enough, but I prefer a man who can show me what he wants!

  18. avatar ET says:

    my only complaint is that sometimes indo boys aren’t aggressive enough. I know they’re interested but they seem nervous to make the move. I’m glad to make the first move if I’m interested enough, but I prefer a man who can show me what he wants!

    Once again an example of the typical Yankee female mindset supposing her apple-pie should taste the same as home.

  19. avatar stupidme says:

    Why all bule women that i met only interested in having sex but not a relationship…..??!! Are all bule women like that, just want to let go some steam like most bule male???

  20. avatar CANDRA says:

    HAHAHAHAHA…

    I was looking for bulwom to date, and found this Bang Dikkiman Sujengkol’s that very kocak and very entertaining. Cool, bang Dikkiman! Sepakat to all your thoughts, cause I’m tired of that serious comments about racialism and blah blah things alike. Smart feedbacks to that comments!

    Okay then, I’ll keep looking for bulwom to date with. Anyone here?

    Adios!

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