Improve Your Writing in English

Jun 6th, 2008, in Internet, Products, by Patung

View the original article here.

11 Comments on “Improve Your Writing in English”

TheWrathOfGrapes Says:
June 10th, 2008 at 7:03 am
Spell Check Poem

Also know as…
The Pullet Surprise Can Did Ate

(Read it out loud!)

Eye halve a spelling chequer
It came with my pea sea,
It plainly marques four my revue
Miss steaks eye kin knot sea.

Eye strike a key and type a word
And weight for it two say,
Weather eye and wring oar write
It shows me strait a weigh.

As soon as a mist ache is maid
It nose bee fore two long,
And eye can put the error rite
Its rare lea ever wrong.

To rite with care is quite a feet
Of witch won should bee proud,
And wee mussed dew the best wee can,
Sew flaw’s are knot aloud.

Eye have run this poem threw it
Your sure reel glad two no,
Its letter perfect awl the weigh
My chequer tolled me sew.

-Sauce unknown
aJ Says:
June 16th, 2008 at 3:16 pm
Ms Office has in-build grammer checker.
Achmad Sudarsono Says:
June 22nd, 2008 at 10:25 am
Patoeng,

You naughty boy, you. I hope this isn’t surreptitious marketing…

Does it really help writing ?

What’s wrong with:

- Reading the text aloud
- Old fashioned computer spellcheck.
- Fowler’s Guide to English Usage

On the other hand, having a program point things out might help you remember the rules through repetition.
kinch Says:
June 22nd, 2008 at 12:27 pm
Sounds very dodgy to me.

One of our resident post-modernists should write a dissertation on the talismanic value of the word ‘Executive’ in South-East Asian Cultures.
janma Says:
June 22nd, 2008 at 2:15 pm
I saw a sign on an Indian lift that said “Today we regret you will be unbearable.”
And lets not forget the famous POLDA billboard that graced Bali’s streets for a good year…. “MENJAUHI NARKOBA. HIDE YOUR DRUGS!”
Patung Says:
June 22nd, 2008 at 2:38 pm
In a certain city in eastern Java there’s been a long-running campaign for “Safety Riding” going on, see, the police everywhere in Indonesia could use Whitesmoke’s stuff, so consider this post as a sort of public service announcement, Achmad. (On the police, once at a major intersection, late afternoon, there was a grown-man policeman standing there with a sign hanging around his neck that said ‘turn your lights on now’, it was in Indonesian, but just funny.)

As for “surreptitious marketing”, I’m sure you’ve heard the expression “I’ve got kids to feed”, or maybe you’d like to know how much time and money this thing costs to keep going, but, anyway, if any of the regulars here have also got kids to feed and have got something to sell, service/product, I’m happy to do some “surreptitious marketing” for them as well.
Achmad Sudarsono Says:
June 22nd, 2008 at 8:21 pm
Pak Patoeng,

Wasn’t a jibe, just a sincere question..: P Might be worth getting the software. No one would begrudge you squeezing some coin out of this fine venture.

The people who do subtitles for pirated movies could do with the software, no doubt. I saw one version of Hamlet’s soliloquoy (spelling), wihch said:

“I am soybean cake. Is many to soybean cake to soybean. That is a question. I am soybean cake.”
dewaratugedeanom Says:
June 23rd, 2008 at 7:15 pm
Patung,

As for “surreptitious marketing”, I’m sure you’ve heard the expression “I’ve got kids to feed”, or maybe you’d like to know how much time and money this thing costs to keep going, but, anyway, if any of the regulars here have also got kids to feed and have got something to sell, service/product, I’m happy to do some “surreptitious marketing” for them as well.

You just blew my cover. My posts here in IM are in fact nothing but advertising and ‘surreptitious marketing’. I may (presumably) not have kids to feed but I do have a service to sell, so free exposure in a worldwide popular forum comes in handy. Keeping oneself in shape and marketable doesn’t come cheap, you know. There is gym subscription, Rasta hairstyling, Oakley sunglasses, Billabong board shorts, Hugo Boss fragrance, pulsa for the Nokia, medical checks… These darn sheilas are becoming more and more demanding and living up to one’s professional integrity is a relentless task.
Thank you and yours sincerely.
Janma Says:
June 24th, 2008 at 11:23 am
Dewa, just in case you didn’t know… billabong has a huge sale on now….
Erma Says:
June 27th, 2008 at 7:22 pm
I sure need grammar checker. Is it available here, in Jakarta?
Patung Says:
June 30th, 2008 at 7:03 pm
Erma, no, it is the sort of thing you have to buy online, like with a credit card, or maybe they take Paypal.